Study Shows 90% Of Santa’s Presents Went To The Top 1% Again This Year

A NEW STUDY by Statistics Canada has shown that 90% of presents from Santa have gone to the wealthiest 1% of Canadians. “This has been the trend for the past 30 years, with an ever increasing amount of presents being disproportionately delivered to the wealthiest families.” Said Janet Frendle, a researcher for Stats Canada, “We hope our study will show what is really going on at the North Pole.” Experts say the reason for this present-gap is the powerful lobbyists that are working at the North Pole to make sure Santa delivers presents to the children of parents who can pay for influence. Santa could not be reached for comment though he has released a statement saying he will no longer be delivering hover boards as they caused his sleigh to burst into flame during a test run resulting in the death of Blitzen.