GREENLAND – “I’ve lived a pretty low-stress life.” Said the 512 year-old Greenland shark named M104, “The only time I get stressed is if I haven’t found something dead to eat in a while.” At 512 years old, M104 has been alive for some of the most important events in human history like the French Revolution and the Renaissance. “I honestly didn’t think much about those things when they happened. I tend to remember the dead whales I come across. Once I found the biggest, fattest dead whale in 1635 and it was just the best. I was full till 1637. I cannot emphasize how important a diet of dead carrion is to living this long. Give it a try and we’ll talk over a nice worm-filled dolphin carcass in 2145.”