Slackliners Only Exist If You Look Directly At Them

“IT IS A PHENOMENON WE CAN’T QUITE UNDERSTAND” said Franz Heinekl, professor of quantum physics at Cornell University, “Slackliners exist in a space outside our dimension and only appear if actively observed. Observing a slackliner, however, does not change his state, it merely enforces our conclusion that slackliners are buffoons who only exist through the attention we give them.” Dr. Heinekl’s research paper on slackliners will be published next fall in Nature. 

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